English Language Part II

A couple weeks ago I wrote a post about the idiosyncrasies of the English language. I enjoyed researching them so much, I decided to share a couple more with you.

Our Strange Lingo

This was written by Lord Cromer, published in the Spectator of August 9th, 1902 and extracts were quoted in an SSS pamflet in 1930.

When the English tongue we speak. Why is break not rhymed with freak? Will you tell me why it's true We say sew but likewise few? And the maker of the verse, Cannot rhyme his horse with worse? Beard is not the same as heard Cord is different from word. Cow is cow but low is low Shoe is never rhymed with foe. Think of hose, dose,and lose And think of goose and yet with choose Think of comb, tomb and bomb, Doll and roll or home and some. Since pay is rhymed with say Why not paid with said I pray? Think of blood, food and good. Mould is not pronounced like could. Wherefore done, but gone and lone - Is there any reason known? To sum up all, it seems to me Sound and letters don't agree. * * * * * This is attributed to Vivian Buchan, NEA Journal 1966/67, USA, published in Spelling Progress Bulletin Spring 1966 pdf, p6, Reprinted from Educational Horizons. Phoney Phonetics. One reason why I cannot spell, Although I learned the rules quite well Is that some words like coup and through Sound just like threw and flue and Who; When oo is never spelled the same, The duice becomes a guessing game; And then I ponder over though, Is it spelled so, or throw, or beau, And bough is never bow, it's bow, I mean the bow that sounds like plow, And not the bow that sounds like row - The row that is pronounced like roe. I wonder, too, why rough and tough, That sound the same as gruff and muff, Are spelled like bough and though, for they Are both pronounced a different way. And why can't I spell trough and cough The same as I do scoff and golf? Why isn't drought spelled just like route, or doubt or pout or sauerkraut? When words all sound so much the same To change the spelling seems a shame. There is no sense - see sound like cents - in making such a difference Between the sight and sound of words; Each spelling rule that undergirds The way a word should look will fail And often prove to no avail Because exceptions will negate The truth of what the rule may state; So though I try, I still despair And moan and mutter "It's not fair That I'm held up to ridicule And made to look like such a fool When it's the spelling that's at fault. Let's call this nonsense to a halt."