Thirty-Two Going on Spinster by Becky Monson
Julia Dorning is a spinster, or at least on the road to becoming one. She has no social life, hates her job, and lives in her parent’s basement with her cat, Charlie.
With the arrival of Jared Moody, the new hire at work, Julia’s mundane life is suddenly turned upside down. Her instant (and totally ridiculous) crush on the new guy causes Julia to finally make some long-overdue changes, in hopes to find a life that includes more than baking and hanging out with Charlie.
But when the biggest and most unexpected change comes, will the new and improved Julia be able to overcome it? Or will she go back to her spinster ways?
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Excerpt
“I feel that, as
a friend, I need to tell you something,” Brown says to me as we go outside to
the smoking area. It’s near the end of the day and Mr. Nguyen had a meeting, so
I figured I could take a little break.
“What is it?” I ask,
not truly caring. I am still annoyed with her. I want to say something, but
there is no point. She wouldn’t care anyway.
“Friends do not
let friends go around with that,” she says, pointing to my upper lip.
“What do you
mean? Is there something on my lip?” I ask, walking over to the door to see if
I can see my reflection in the glass. I can’t see anything.
“Yes, there is
something on your upper lip… hair.”
Whaaaaaaaaat?
“Are you serious? I have a moustache?” My hand immediately goes up to my mouth,
covering it and my upper lip. “But… I… How bad?” Somehow this is very fitting.
A spinster with a moustache.
“Look, it’s not bad.
And we do not call it a ‘moustache,’ it’s referred to as ‘upper lip hair,’”
says the perfectly-put-together prom queen. “You have sort of… always had one.
But it was always blonde hair, so I never said anything. But now, all of the
sudden, there are brown hairs as well as the blonde.”
I guess right now would be a
good time to die. I mean, I recently had a conversation with a good-looking man
and this hasn’t happened in, well, over a decade. And I realize it wasn’t a
real conversation since I couldn’t say more than three word sentences. But he
was talking to me up-close and—oh my gosh, he could have seen it. Of course he
did because that is how my life goes. I am an
under-a-conference-table-hiding-deaf-mute-possibly-slow-spinster… with a
moustache. Next comes sagging boobs and trailer parks.
Author Becky Monson
By day, Becky Monson is a mother of three young children, and a wife. By night, she escapes with reading books and writing. In her debut novel, Becky uses humor and true-life experiences to bring her characters to life. She loves all things chick-lit (movies, books, etc), and wishes she had a British accent. She has recently given up Diet Coke for the fiftieth time and is hopeful time will last... But it probably won't. Becky runs a large book club on Facebook called "This Chick Reads".
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